Disabled. Mentally.

Dontrelle Willis
Khalil Greene

What do these players have in common? They were all recently put on the disabled list because of non-physical disabilities. Social anxiety. What kind of injury is social anxiety anyway?

I will tell you what kind, the bullshit kind. I wonder if it is a coincidence that both of these guys are down right terrible. Willis with his 7.49 ERA and just about a walk an inning, and Greene batting .200 and K'ing about twice per walk.

Last time I checked playing terrible was not a reason to hit the DL. It was a reason to hit the minors. They are probably anxious because they suck, and know they will both be without jobs soon.

So the logic here is:

1. Guy plays terrible.
2. Guy loses confidence and gets anxious.
3. Guy goes on DL.

Wow GM's are getting creative these days. Pretty much teams can make up injuries for guys who are not playing well. Gets them a trip to the minors with out using up an option or having a guy hit waviers. The Yankees did it with Wang this year, and now we see it with these two bums.

How about players and GM's man up and play like Sandy Koufax, like a man.

Just to be fair, Joey Votto also went on the DL with "Stress related issues". In this case I doubt it was fancy GM moves, becuase Votto was playing great and was arguably the best player on the team.

Heh, lets play mad libs

that's right this blog ______!


Fill in the blank.

Sports, the over protective parent

I am so annoyed at the moment I don't know where to start.

In today's news, AJ Burnett has been suspended for 6 games, for not hitting a guy with the baseball. Unreal. Yea I know the ball was high and in, but really is there an easier pitch to get out of the way of? Nope just fall down. Oh and Padilla who hit the same guy twice(causing AJ's retaliation) was not suspended. Oh yea AJ wasn't even ejected in the game.

So moral of the story, don't miss a guy high and in, instead bean him twice. Preferably in the elbow/arm/hand or ribs so something breaks. Ridiculous.

While that got me annoyed its not the only thing. This isn't just baseball that is unreasonable with "protecting" players. All sports seem to be trying to keep up with over protective parents who don't let their kids know whats in the outside world.

We saw it through out the whole NBA finals. People were getting called for flagrant and flagrant 2's all over the place. Most of these plays were just hard tough basketball. I mean if we had the NBA reviewing our pick-up games we all end up with 3 flagrant fouls a night. Heck Paster Nelson would probably be suspended every other night.

Then we have maybe the most protective sport out there, the NFL. I am not sure if your allowed to hit quarterbacks or wide recivers anymore. Actually I am pretty sure next year quarter backs will have flags, and you will have to pull out the flag to tackle him. If you hit the QB its a 70 yard penalty and an automatic 8 points.

Really though the NFL rules are rediculous. No helmet to helmet hits, no hitting the QB above the shoulders, no hitting the QB below the knee, no hitting the QB after throwing.

Helmet to helmet hits happen mostly with DB's and WR's. You have two guys running rediculously fast, not looking at the other guy, and jumping in the air. Yet with all that they still expect a DB to make sure he doesn't hit the WR the wrong way. Half the time the DB is going to hit him in the pads then the WR curls his head down, But you know the DB was trying to hurt him.

As for the rules with QB's I really think they should just give them red jerseys and flags. The NFL expects a 300 pound man in a sprint to stop on a dime, or manouver so they don't hit the guy. Oh and you NFL DLinemen, when you get past your blocker, and he pushes you from behind, don't fall and hit the QB's legs, thats a penalty too.

I hate the NFL.

Just like over protective parents are creating useless kids who are retarded pussies, and don't know a lug nut from a from their Senate representives, over protective sports are just making games painful and annoying to watch. Let kids learn on thier own, let players play the game.


UPDATE:

As I suggested in a previous post Wang is now in the rotation with Hughes in the pen. I am not sure Wang showed he deserved it yet, and after his 4 innings and 5 earned runs today I really doubt he did.

They got skillz....

Hello Ladies and Gentlemen. The Godfather of sports is back. Me and JP are in the midst of a heated debate in reference to my ideas for a baseball skills competition. I'll let you read below and respond accordingly. Let us know how you feel.

JP:

F I wrote a whole thing and my browser went nuts and lost it. I'll recap.

First I never said the NBA skills competition sucked. It's the best out of all of them, and receives by far the most media hype. The NFL does a skills thing, it's fairly dumb as they are all super athletes, fighting stand still dummies shows nothing. Fighting against Orlando Pace is a skill, anyone can swim move a padded dummy.

A) Hitting the hockey targets was cool to see once. They can all do it, all 4 targets get broken. Whoopiee do. It would be the same for pitchers. They can all hit targets with no pressure on them. It's part of weekly practice.... yipeeeee.

B) You can watch purpose hitting any day during normal BP. Players go oppo, move the runner over, bunt, pull balls, sac fly, home run. They practice a similar sequence everyday. The challenge is doing it with people throwing 95 mph heaters and 87mph sliders. That's why they are in the bigs...you get to see the true skills during games. Doing it with a 50 year old BP pitcher throwing 78 down the middle would get old in about 5minutes.

C) Speed challenges are dangerous to the speed guys, many of them (Like Jose) would be very likely to pull a hamstring or calf muscle (pulling a calf is hard, but jose does it every night). It would be just as effective for the teams to post all these times for you to read over since they do this crap in tryouts.

In short a skills challenge is a spring training practice. This may be exciting for a few minutes to people who don't know, but I couldnt careless.


The Godfather:

A. you played college baseball. which is awesome yet somewhere in between highschool and the pros. so honestly u fall somewhere inbetween John Massaro and Tim Lincecum which means although you and your team did these things in practice....no one would care. we wanna see the best of the best do it.... in front of national tv. with a time limit. if u disagree it could be cool i will gladly set up 4 targets the size of a baseball. pull out a stop watch and see how fast you can hit all 4. If hitting the bottom outside corner is so easy then why can't some major league players do it every time. its called missing location. it happens. didn't know u hit the spots every time. cool.

B. Purpose hitting has nothing to do it. a huge target in the outfield gaps is hardly purpose hitting. if u asked me to poke a 75 mph pitch to right field i could do it 5 out of 10 times. but hitting a line drive right in the gap at a target or maybe aiming specifically for certain targets that give u more points would be cool and would really test these guys. hitting opposite field : easy .... Being down 300 points in a competition and having 2 pitches to hit the right field wall with a line drive which is worth 350 points? exciting. sorry.

C. running around the bases 1 time and sprinting to 1st is no different then playing in the allstar game and trying to beat out a hit or stealing a base. Just because baseball players get hurt doesn't mean they wouldn't want to test there skills. they wouldn't have to do it. they'd have an option.

my point is the allstar game is boring. skills competitions are fun for the general public. honestly your reasoning had nothing to do with my ideas. you simplified everything. 99.9 percent of fans never played college baseball so these things would be fun to watch. end of story. not sure why you would even argue against that for no reason at all. do u just try to play devils advocate for everything?



Let us know your feelings on a skills challenge to go along with the home run derby. Lets get people to know and respect men like Freddy Sanchez.

Wlecome to the Phil Hughes show

Those of you who know me, and speak to me regularly have heard me say this before, but this time I think it might stick. I am been waiting for this type of start since he had his no-hitter injury. Since that injury he just has not been the same. Until yesterday.

People will point to Phil's less then stellar ERA of 5.16, but take away that one terrible outing and he is pitching respectably. He is certainly not a stud/star/ace yet but he could be on his way if he keeps it up. He is already the 4th best starter on that team, considering the great AJ Burnett is what anyone with brains would have expected. At least Hughes bought himself another start.

The question is going to be what do the Yankees do with Hughes and Wang if Hughes continues to pitch well. Do the Yankees leave Hughes in the rotation and Wang in the pen? Or vice versa? I think the real question is if Wang can pitch again, and which of the two would help the bullpen the most.

I am not sure if I trust Wang yet. He pitched OK, at best, in his return from the DL on Friday. His ERA dropped 10 runs, but 2 runs in 3 innings is nothing to be proud of. I think Wang needs to prove that he can put in a string of good outtings before he earns his rotation spot back.

In the end though, and I hate to say this, I think Hughes might be better for the team in the bullpen. Let Wang start, IF and only IF, he can show that he deserves it. Then let Phil be what Joba was for the Yankees the last few years. With Brueny out for who knows how long, Phil can go in the pen and get strikeouts, something Wang cannot do. I think that helps the Yankees the most, kills my fantasy squads, but helps the Yankees. But if Wang can show he can get guys out then let Phil rack up the innings, K's, and wins.

Either way people, Welcome to the Phil Hughes show!!

Where you at Matt?

Matt Holliday please come save the Mets. I know it's not up to you but I'm gonna appeal to you first. We need your professionalism and supreme gap power. Some people (no one I wanna be friends with anyway) have already given up on you this season, they forget we are barely 35 games into a 162 game season and you've already raised your average to the .270 area with 5 HRs after your worst start ever. How quickly they forget your 25/25 prowess or your 130 rbis and your batting title capabilities. Well Matt, I haven't forgotten and I can only hope Omar Minaya hasn't either.

You are wasting away on a team that can't protect you in the lineup, can't win games, and surely doesn't deserve you. The Mets have some trade chips that need to be used. Lets get the job done Omar. Cheers to starting the hype machine early.

Whats wrong with...

that manager?

That team is in some real trouble, because that manager seems to be turning his back on some players on his team. How can you single out one guy who made a a base running error, and go as far to not say his name, especially since there were 5 errors in that game, 2 that cost you the game.

Its a big mistake to miss third base, a huge mistake, but its not unheard of. I mean you have a not so fast guy hustling his ass off to score the go ahead run. I can understand in this situation where you could miss the bag. Its literally a .1 second play. Is it excusable? Not at all.

But you know what else is not excusable? Your star center fielder dropping a ball to setup the other team to score the winning run. And don't you tell me its that other outfielders fault. That center fielder should be the guy the manager doesn't acknowledge. He is supposed to be a leader on the team, a guy people look up to.

This isn't the first time this season he has done something lazy or lackadaisical either. Remember when he forgot to slide into home plate? I would have benched him then. That is unacceptable, that is pure laziness and not caring. Missing third base is a mistake that hustling caused.

Listen that manger, be a professional and treat your players like professionals. Bench the players that are lazy, make them know hustle is required. Or you can ignore me and I see you in September as your season slips away, again, and again.

Roid Raid Roger

Roger Clemens was on Mike and Mike yesterday trying to pre-emptively strike out against this new book published against him. Do I really care that Roger did steroids at this point? Or that he keeps denying it? No, I don't. I had a first hand look at steroid use in baseball and it's hurt a lot of people, more so the people who got looked over because they weren't throwing or hitting as hard as the juice head next to them. I'm over it, and I don't even bat an eye anymore when guys like Manny test positive.

What I do care about is Roger acting like a clown pretending he has no knowledge of the effects, benefits, or harm a steroid or HGH causes. Listen Roger, whether you took them or not you knew people and trainers who did. I know what they do, my mom knows what they do, and so do you. Anyone involved in a sport over the last 10 years has learned what steroids do, they don't dissolve ligaments Roger, they help you win 7 Cy Youngs, and if taken correctly they don't "kill you". Your public lack of knowledge of anything about performance enhancers has in my mind solidified the fact that you did take them.

You aren't making yourself look more innocent by saying crap like heart disease runs in my family so steroids would be suicide, or that you hope what A-Rod took won't harm his future career. You probably took ephedrine to lose weight when that was all the rage Roger; that's probably worse for the heart problems that run in your family. That didn't stop you then, and it didn't stop you when you and your buddy Andy were shooting up and throwing gems. Is Andy still alive Roger? Isn't Jose Canseco? (albeit with small balls, that's what chronic, improper use does Roger, it doesn't dissolve you like a disruptor cannon from Star Trek) Oh wait, that's only 2 names, how about 70% of all baseball players from college on up for the last 10 years Roger, are they all disintegrated?

Deny your use all you want, (no one believes you by the way) but don't act dumb like you don't know what they do. You're an idiot, you made money using your body, not your mind. Stop trying to trick people who are smarter than you. Also-idiot, no one even knew this book was coming out until you advertised it for them. Your attempt at being smart has just left you looking even dumber than before, and that's a feat you accomplished without the help of a needle.

Joba

So as I sit here and watch the Mets bullpen blow another Johan gem I am thinking about all this talk about Joba.

Just about evvvveryone in the greater NY area is talking about Joba and his fist pump and how Aubrey Huff fist pumped him back after is 3 run HR. Well I have a question for all of you, who the smurf cares? Does it reaaaaaaallly matter? Don't the Yankees have bigger things to worry about like Arod(pick 1 of 100 specific things), the shitty bullpen, Hughes/Wang, and the rest of the starting rotation?

People are apparently offended by the fact that Joba is "showing no class". Well people class left baseball a few decades ago, get over it. I mean is it classier for Albert Pujols to stand there and watch his HR? Is it classier for Derek Jeter to fist pump when someone K's a guy to end the inning? Oh you never saw Jeter do that? Well you haven't been watching, or maybe you have but neglected to remember.

As for Aubrey Huff, he can go smurf a goat. Who in the hell are you Aubrey Huff? You bat .268, and your team is in last place, again. Rather then calling team meetings to discuss how "Joba showed us up last time so lets do it to him" how about you get ready for the game or read the scouting report, because your team sucks and has for the last 11 years.

Just like you and I have different options, emotions, and personalities so do baseball players. Get over it people.

Brett Favre

You've had a great career. You don't want to stop playing. Fine! Just stop telling people you are retired. All you have to do is say I am taking this year to year and will reevaluate after each season. This selfish I'm retired until summer crap is getting old, only ESPN even cares anymore.

All week on ESPN is Brett Favre rumors; he's playing, he's not playing, he just went to the bathroom. No one cares, really ESPN, your own sportscasters are faking the enthusiasm while they read these tired, rehashed stories.

At this point I don't even know who to blame for this overblown Favre coverage. Is it driven by Brett Favre's huge ego? Driven by ESPN's man crush that they can't let go? Or is it by these teams that keep going after Favre, even though he doesn't want to participate in camps or be a real teammate other than picking some receiver up in the end zone to make sure people know he's playing for fun? If I had to guess I'd say it's Favre's inability to think about anyone but himself and ESPN's bromance for the old gunslinger.

Listen, Favre is a great quarterback, I'm just tired of hearing about him. What do you guys think?

Sports Brothel Is Back

Today Marks the full return of the Sports Brothel. Let us do what we do best. Talk sports in unreasonable style.

A few random matters

Lets Open Discussions on a few matters. Since i think the BHH is the only man who reads this along with me then i only expect a few responses if any.

1. So close on my prediction of the hawks beating the celts. I went out on a limb and that limb broke on me. Just happy the hawks made it that far. I mean who else thought a game 7 was gonna happen.

2. I predicted Ryan Howard was a glorified less talented version of Jim Thome in his Prime. My theory was shot down by many.... and well..... Ryan Howard is indeed worse then Jim Thome in his Prime. Any man who k's 200 times and wears a big league uniform is absolute garbage. When he connects, of course it goes out of the ball park, he's fat. 

3.  New Prediction - Nate Mcclouth is NOT the real deal.

4.  Mike Lincoln just walked in a run with 2 outs. My man David Wright. If thats not reason enough to send Mike Lincoln to the minors (you should NEVER walk in a run in the big leagues)....

5. Beltran triples next at bat. Thanks Mike Lincoln.

6. Knicks sign coach Mike D'antoni. You serious? This guy couldn't win with players like Steve Nash, Amare Stoudemire, Shawn Marion, Shaq, and a bevy of other quality role players but he's gonna win with the knicks? 

You can't think winning a championship is possible with him leading this pack of misfits.

Knicks in 2020

Sports Don....OUT

6. 

I think its time......

...for super prospect Phil Hughes to hit the bricks back to AAA or AA. It hurts me to say it, I love the kid. I think he will in the near future be a rock solid anchor in the Yankee rotation, but that time is not now. Phil continued his string of poor outings tonight, giving up 6 runs in 3 and 2/3 innings. This totals his stats to:

      W   L   IP     H     R     ER    BB   K    ERA   WHIP
      0   3   18.1   26    17    16    10   11   7.85  1.96    

To me his biggest problem seems to be that he is scared of challenging batters. He seems to be pitching like a Greg Maddux, just with out the pin point control. When that happens you throw a lot of pitches, walk a lot of guys, and end up in a lot of jams. Add all those things together and it sure as hell ain't looking good. Hughes is supposed to be a power pitcher, a guy who says "I dare to you try and hit this, bitch!!" So whats the problem? One problem seems to be that he has lost about 3 to 5 mph of his fastball. If he realizes he has lost his velocity then he might be scared to throw a strike because he doesn't want a guy to shell him.

So Hughes needs a trip to the minors, and very soon so he can get his career back on track. Down in Scranton he can regain his confidence and his velocity. One extra thought with the velocity. It seems like a lot of previously successful pitchers(Zito, Bret Myers, Hughes, there are more) are not doing so well, and the main culprit is a unexplainable drop in velocity. I certainly hope these unexplainable situations are not so very explainable if adding steroids and HGH to the conversation.

So if the Yankees are going to send Hughes down who do they bring up? I hate to say, I really hate to say it, but I think its time to see Kei Igawa. I don't like him, never did, but I think he could at least give the team 6 innings, if not a win or two.

Ahhh soon I feel I will be cursing Kei Igawa soon too. I hate the Yankees pitching staff, but am still glad I don't see Johan Santana every 5 days.

Sports Don Found Half Dead In South American Rain Forest...... By being half dead He was still more alive then Rocco Baldelli.

BHH saved me from the likes of the evil Bohemian Amazon Furry Snake shortly after asking of my where abouts. I've always been one for adventure and excitement so i decided to take a flight down to south america and roam around a little. On my journey i ran into a badger and a one eyed toad who took me in to help me find inner peace. On the 13th day of that experience after drinking something they referred to as "jungle juice" (very similar to a blend of juice we make with everclear here in the states actually) I got so drunk i wandered in the rain forest. In the rain forest i ran into Luke Conway who introduced me to the giant Evil Furry Snake. It was then i realized the badger and one eyed toad were in on this plot to kill the sports don (myself) for that time I handled the family business and spoke sports trash to the badgers brother. Ike. The first chance i got i was able to write a letter (I always carry supplies for times like this) and i sent a carrier pigeon to bring the letter to the bean head hater. The Bean immediately Got on a boat and came to get me.

Now that i'm back... lets talk some sports.

Can the Hawks Beat the Celtics and Advance in the Playoffs?

Mike Bibby has experience in big games which Rondo doesn't have and isn't 56 years old like Cassell. Enough said. Joe Johnson will be able to score baskets on Allen but will he be able to guard the penetration and dish out? he'll probably have to worry about Paul Pierce also as Josh Smith will have his Hands Full trying to accumulate blocks against The Big Ticket who will surely look to dominate now that he has a legit chance at an nba title.

All in All I don't have much to say other then this will probably be alot closer then most people think. I see the Hawks Matching up fairly well if only because of the athletisism they bring to the table. I say they can and will shock the celtics.

The don can't wait to say he told you so.

don...out!

MIssing person!!

Where has The Sports Don gone? Is he lost in the Congo? Maybe in the Bering sea catching crabs on that show Mike Rowe narrates? Or could he possibly be at the Playboy mansion boning broads with huge mammies all day and night? Naaa can't be, he must be somewhere else.

Where are you Sports Don?

My Cardinal Sins of Baseball

You know when your a professional baseball player you are expected to be able to do certain things. These things are the fundamentals, the things you learn in little league from the fathers who think that their kids are going to be the next major leaguers. Yet every time I watch a game, or see highlights on Sportscenter I see things that should not under an circumstances happen at the major league level.

This list will be revised and updated as I see fit, but for now here are the two cardinal sins of baseball:

1. Thou shall not walk in runs - A professional pitcher should under no circumstances walk in any run in any game in any situation. Ever. This one is seen all the time, some middle relief guy named Dipshit McDouche comes in walks two guys to load the bases and then a third to walk in a run. Just throw a strike man! Seriously lob one in, give the guy a meat ball if he hits it probability says it will most likely be an out.
   
   Those who violate this sin should immediately get shipped to the minors for a game. I don't care if your name is Johan Santana, you walk in a run...TO THE MINORS WITH YOU!!!
   
   
2. Thou shall be able to bunt - Infuriating to see a major league hitter not be able to lay down a bunt when needed. The worst is when your an NL pitcher and you need to sacrifice a guy to second or third and you can't get a bunt down. I think right before Pedro popped his hammy he had trouble laying down a bunt for a sacrifice. Well that hammy injury was the Force punishing him for the inability to bunt. Baseball and the Force are powerful allies.
   
   Or when your Jason Giambi and the whole defense plays you to pull the ball, how about you try and lay one down the third baseline? I mean give it a shot man, then if it works then the stop playing the shift on you and you get more hits through the holes. Hit to the holes the defense gives you.
   
   And when your team is trying to pull off a suicide squeeze, you better get the bat on the ball some how. I don't care if you have to dive, jump, duck, or cartwheel to get wood on the ball, just do it. The Devil Rays, I mean Rays, screwed that up against the Yankees the other day. With Aybar on third, Jason Bartlett missed the bunt completely, and Aybar was caught in no mans land. Cost them a run and maybe a rally that could have won them the game.
   
   Those who violate this sin should be benched immediately, for that game and maybe the next. As for Jason Bartlett who missed the squeeze bunt, TO THE MINORS!!!! There is no excuse for this, you people are professional baseball players.

Finally I said I would give my seasons end standings for the league, so here we go:

NL West

1. Arizona Diamondbacks
2. LA Dodgers
3. Colorado Rockies
4. San Diego Padres
   
5. San Francisco Giants
   

NL Central

1. Cincinnati Reds
2. Chicago Cubs
3. Milwaukee Brewers
4. St. Louis Cardinals
5. Huston Astros
6. Pittsburgh Pirates
   

NL East

1. Philadelphia Phillies
2. New York Mets
   
3. Atlanta Braves
4. Washington Nationals
5. Florida Marlins

AL West

1. Anaheim Angels (to hell with Los Angeles)
2. Seattle Mariners
   
3. Texas Rangers
4. Oakland Athletics

AL Central

1. Cleveland Indians
   
2. Kansas City Royals
3. Detroit Tigers
   
4. Chicago White Sox
5. Minnesota Twins

AL East

1. New York Yankees
2. Boston Red Sox
3. Tampa Bay Rays
4. Toronto Blue Jays
5. Baltimore Orioles
   

The wild cards will be the Red Sox and the Mets.

So there you have it, those WILL BE the season standings at the end of the year, end of story.

Until next time, keep your pimp hand strong!!

Week 1 Round Up

What a glorious week it has been!!! Gotta say once baseball season hits life is always good, because no matter how shitty a day you have just had you know you get to watch your team play and thats super(unless they lose and then your more pissed). Anyways welcome to the best time of year friends.

Lets start it up with the week one round up:

The Royals swept the Tigers - I am sure just about everyone is aware of this by now because it is pretty darn ridiculous. But the Royals didn't just beat the Tigers they pretty much dominated them. Could this be the year the Royals put together a good year? They have not been over .500 since 2003, and before that it was 1994. I think this could be the year they have a solid season, and go above .500. They have a solid lineup with Gordon, Butler, and Guillen knocking in Gruds, Teahen, and DeJesus. I also think maybe this can be the year that they have 3 solid, not great, but solid starters to throw out there. I don't think they can win the division and certainly not the wild card, but an above .500 year is a good start for this franchise.

PS. Butler- 22-109-.310 Gordon-20-115-.290

Fragile Handle with Care Department - Well welcome back to the disabled list Pedro, Mike Hampton, Rocco Baldelli, and Scott Rolen!! I swear they just keep coming back because the food is so good. There are other guys who hit the DL recently to but those guy are not as much fun to harass.

Pedro popped his hammy throwing a pitch, the funny part about this(at least for me is the conversation The Sports Don and I had earlier that night before the fateful pitch:

(2008-04-01 18:47:06) Donbot: i look for pedro to compete for the cy young this year with santana
(2008-04-01 18:51:25) Me: no chance
(2008-04-01 18:51:47) Donbot: u'll see
(2008-04-01 18:52:30) Me: I will see him start 20 games if he is lucky
(2008-04-01 18:52:53) Donbot: fair enough. we agree to disagree
.....
.....
(2008-04-01 20:32:22) Me: DL stint #1 coming up
(2008-04-01 20:32:49) Donbot: jesus christmas
(2008-04-01 20:33:08) Me: wow man
(2008-04-01 20:33:27) Me: I didnt mean to jinx him, but 20 starts it is

Really I didn't mean to jinx him. Now a days you have to know Pedro is going to get hurt he hasn't throw 200 innings since 2005, and is just getting older. I would hate to think that Omar went into this season with his fingers crossed. NO he wouldn't do that, I am sure he has a backup plan better then Claudio Vargas.

Then we have the mandatory Mike Hampton DL stint. Strained left pectoral. So basicly he hurt his left titty. Imagine your wife/girl friend/lover/one night stand said to you "Honey I can't do it tonight, I strained my left titty." You would probably fire her, or at least send her to the bedroom for the night while you do whatever it is you do online. Thats what someone needs to say to Mike Hampton, "YOUR FIRED". I don't know why you sign him to anything less then a minor league deal anyway. Guy has not thrown more then 200 innings since 2001, and has not pitched at all since 2005. So while your on the DL Mike enjoy wraslin' gators in the swamp of Florida.


Toujours blesser Rocco!!!! Rocco has had just about every aliment know to man ACL, Tommy John, pulled hamstrings, but this new one is an interesting one. He now has a "Mitochondrial disorder, a condition that causes extreme fatigue". So in other words he just gets reeallly tired after playing. Maybe that stems from not playing for so long? Probably not, but just asking. At least the Rays have smartened up and declined his option for next year, so someone else will have to deal with this walking catastrophe.

Finally we have Scott Rolen, who when healthy is a solid all around player. But he has missed a lot of games in his career. 50 missed games in 1999, 30 in 2000, 20 in 2004, 105 in 2005, 20 in 2004, and 50 last year. Most of that time was with various shoulder injuries. This year he starts the season on the DL with a broken right finger. The claim is out for 3 to 5 weeks, but I will lay money he gets some other injury some how.

What helmet? - Well Larry Bowa let the MLB know what he thought about this new rule requiring base coaches to wear helmets and the new rule about staying within the coaches box. Gotta say that Bowa id 100% correct, can say I agree with his methods, but the message is right. These rules are nothing more the public relations and CYA legal maneuvering. These new rules were put into place this season because of the death of Mike Coolbaugh last year. Mike was hit in the the neck with a line drive, which killed him. Thats a horrible thing to happen and everyone wishes things like that would never happen, but sometimes they do.

The helmet rule is down right ludicrous. Apparently this helmet :

Is going to protect a base coach from being injured by a line drive. Um how about no ya crazy dutchman. The helmet doe not protect anything more then the top of your head, also the part which needs the least protection because it is so hard. The soft parts of the neck, ears, temples, back of the head are all still very much exposed. So basically baseball has made a rule, which most coaches are very much against, that does nothing but look good to the ingorant sheep known as Americans. I feel like the MLB has magically turned into the Federal Government who only pick solutions that help on the nearest election day.

Ya know MLB most of these guys have been in the league for the better parts of their lives. Let them choose to wear a helmet or not, and any new guys into the league have to wear the helmet. I think its called grandfathering or something like that. NHL did it once, maybe call them up for some advice.
Barry who?Barry still does not have a job. How this is I am not sure. I mean yea he might get put in jail, he might be linked forever to steriods, he might be a huge jerk, but I KNOW he can help some team win games as a DH. End of story.

Yearly Awards - Here I am going to give you my picks for MVP, Cy young, ROY, and such.

NL MVP - Dave Wright (32, 120, .310, 26)
AL MVP - Can you guess? Alex Rodriguez (60, 153, .321, 10)

NL Cy Young - Johan Santana (22-5, 2.10, 234)
AL Cy Young - Scott Kazmir(18-10, 2.65, 216)

NL ROY - Jay Bruce (20, 70, .270)
AL ROY - Joba Chamberlain(10-1, 1.81, 107)

AL SB - Carlo Gomez - 54
NL SB - Jose Reyes - 61

Also the Yankees will win the AL east. Next time I will give you all my division standings for the end of the year. Until then its on like Donkey Kong!!

Charlie and the Great Glass Elev...errr....Baseball Players

Ok once again this will be an opinion piece and contain almost no information of value. This is definitely more of a rant then anything else.

With that said... Why are Baseball players such complete Fairy's?

Almost Immediately after I expressed to the Bean Head Hater that Pedro Martinez was back to stay and was going to compete for a Cy Young with his Friend Johan, he pulls up limp with another injury. This injury caused an immediate uproar in my bedroom followed by a trip into the kitchen for a $1.00 oven pizza to cheer me up. Happy i am not.

You put the left foot in, you pull the left foot out, you put the left foot in and you.... get an injury?
It seriously is starting to seem like no matter what these guys do nowadays they can't stay on the field. Its a crying shame when 98% of the league does not hustle to first base but i am now seeing exactly why. With any type of hustle or pushing of the envelope these men crumble like a delightful block of cheese. Hell most of the time they get hurt doing basic baseball maneuvers.
Yes Yes I understand that these mean put above normal strain on their bodies doing unnatural movements to the max but c'mon.

Its obviously not just Pedro Martinez. He's not even close to the worst.
Scott Rolen, Mark Prior, Rich Harden, Kerry Wood, AJ Burnett, and of course the Biggest Nancy of them all.... Rocco Friggin Baldelli all enjoy just traveling with the team rather then playing with the team.

I don't know where exactly i am going with this other then to say that if you feel the way i do and can't stand seeing your favorite ball players collecting paychecks for doing absolutely nothing then let me know.

I want to open this up for comments on who you think could be the biggest towel boy in baseball and why.

Lets send our best talent to the minors!!

I don't understand the deal with some teams this season, or any season really because this has happened for years. Why do teams with little or no chance to win a division title this season insist on sending the best talent on their teams to triple A? There seems to be a heavy list of guys that should be playing in the big leagues that instead will toil on some small town team with a weird name like Mud Hens, Iron Pigs, Sea Dogs, or Isotopes.

Jarrod Saltalamacchia - This kid can hit and everyone knows it. Its not a secret anymore. Yet Jarrod will spend at least the start of his season as a Red Hawk, rather then a Ranger. Now this is a guy who can catch, play first base, and since they are in the AL he can DH. Well you say there must be good veterans blocking his positions, I guess if you consider Gerald Laird, Ben Broussard, and Jason Botts good veterans. I don't, and you shouldn't either.

Broussard is the only guy with any significant MLB experience, but as Cleveland, and Seattle know he is not a guy you want anchoring first base for your team all season. This is what he did last year:

G   AB  R  H  2B 3B  HR  RBI   BB   K   SB  AVG   OBP   SLG   OPS
99  240 27 66 10  0   7   29   17   50   2  .275  .330  .404  .734

Not all to impressive.

Then we have the two guys who really have almost no real time in the majors, career stats:

        G   AB   R   H  2B  3B  HR  RBI  BB  K    SB   AVG    OBP    SLG    OPS
Laird   120  407  48  91 18  3   9   47   30  103   6   .224   .278   .349   .627
Botts   48   167  19  40  8  1   2   14   19  59    1   .240   .326   .335   .662

Notice the sub .250 batting averages on both these guys, the horrible K/BB ratio, and overall poor numbers.

Finally we have Salty who did the following during his time in Atlanta and Texas last season:

G     AB    R    H    2B   3B    HR   RBI    BB    K     SB    AVG     OBP     SLG     OPS
93    308  39    82   13    1    11    33    19    75    0    .266    .310    .422    .732

Great numbers? No not really, but clearly better then the other 3 guys listed above him. Oh did I mention he is also five years YOUNGER then the youngest(Botts) of Botts, Laird, and Broussard? Its moves like this that make everyone realize why Texas hasn't won a division title since 1999.

Luke Hochevar - Anyone know where the Royals are going to end the season? Oh last place you say? Horrible team you say? Yea thats about 100% right. So what do they do? Oh send the 2006 #1 draft pick down to the Omaha Royals (who could probably beat the real Royals). Granted he is young and only has 12 innings pitched in the majors(with an ERA of 2.13 I might add), but what do the royals have to lose? Instead they are going to run out bums like Brett Tomko(career: 93-92, 4.62, 1.37), and John Bale(career: 3-3, 4.47, 1.44) rather then the guy the spent the first pick in of the 2006 draft on. Granted I can hear some of you now, "But oh great Bean Head Hater aren't you worried he could get hit hard in the bigs and be ruined?!" Um NO I AM NOT!!! Doesn't matter when he comes up, if it is now or in 5 years, if he is a weak minded guy and he gets smoked then he will be ruined. Doesn't matter if it is now or when I have kids(which is a long time away). I see the Royals being in last place, AGAIN.


Evan Longoria - Yea so here we have another very good Tampa Bay prospect who has shown great skills in the minors. Its amazing how much good hitting they have, but I guess 1000 years in last place and top draft picks will do that to you. Mr. Longoria has nothing to prove, at all, in the minors. Since 2006 he has steadily dominated the minor league levels as he moved up, and scouts love him. In 2007 his minor league stats:

       AB   R    H   2B   HR   RBI   BB   K    AVG   OBP   SLG  OPS
AA      381  78  117  21   21    76   51   81  .307  .403  .528 .931
AAA     104  19  28   8     5    19   22   29  .269  .398  .490 .888

The greatest stat on this line is his almost 1 to 1 walk to strike out ratio in triple A. That means he had no problem handling the pitching there, and any drop seen in those stats is mostly due to bad luck. This kid is ready for the big time, but who is stopping him? Oh the super star Willy Aybar(that rhymes). The Rays moved incumbent natural 3B Iwamura to second to make room for Longoria, so I am sure sometime this season we will see him him, but why wait. Willy is not a good option, I don't care how good his stats look.

Cameron Maybin - Who in Luke Skywalkers name is Alejandro De Aza?!? Oh hes the guy standing in center field for the Florida Marlins. the same guy who has a career .229 average, with 0 home runs, 8 RBI, and 2 stolen bases, in 144 AB of work. Wait, go back and read that impressive stat line. Yes this guy is blocking Maybin, a legit 20/20 threat in his rookie season, 30/30 after that. I guess the Marlins are thinking they have a chance(I don't) and De Aza is the better choice(I don't). I really do think Cameron can hit better then .229 in 144 AB, seems inevitable. Either way Cameron will start his season as a Mudcat, not a big fish.

Honorable mentions:

• Homer Baily, Reds - He is probably better off as far away from Dusty Baker as he can get.
• Jay Bruce, Reds - My main man dominated the minors more so then the above listed Evan Longoria, but has a HOF, and a guy who hits 40 HRs in his way. Its a wait to see how long it is until Griffey gets hurt.
• Steve Pearce, Pirates - Can only play the corner OF spots and he isn't moving Jason Bay or Nady anytime soon.
• Josh Fields - He should probably be listed above.
• Chase Headly - Kouzmanoff isn't great by any stretch, but he isn't bad by any stretch either. Chase better learn how to play RF before Brian Giles falls over dead in the 7th inning of some game in June.

I must say thank you to Mr. JP for getting me started with my anger of the stupidity of some of these moves, with out his bantering I might not have decided to write this.

Fairwell Chikezie and Good Job Knicks

Since the BHH hates the program and it's a competition and not exactly a sport i'll keep this short.

Although he impressed me with his rare display of relevance two weeks ago, Chikezie was usually boring. He's off Idol. The world keeps spinning.


In other shocking News, even the Knicks can't lose every game. Tonight the lowly Knicks defeated the Heat in an OT slobber knocker! Inserted into the starting lineup, my hero, David Lee score 15 points and brought in 16 monster boards. Congrats David and i apologize Zeke Thomas refuses to give you the 35 mpg you deserve on a consistent basis.

Oh by the way.... Malik Rose takes those minutes from you.

Which brings me to my question of the night. Who else still gets minutes in the NBA that shouldn't and why? I'm curious to see what any readers may think.